Glorious 5 May

With the hayfever season upon us, The Snake gets analogous with the British political landscape

On 5 May, Britain’s three leading super yacht manufacturers will simultaneously launch new models. In the build up to this event, each company has embarked on an intense and - invariably - dull marketing campaign that is often misleading. To bring clarity to this situation, thedailysail provides a brief review of the forthcoming models.

The popular powercruisers produced by Blair-Brown Marine Industries (BBMI) have held an enduring appeal for those in search of a dependable, family powercruiser. Following damaging accusations of their supply of misleading sales literature, the company will discover if its latest flagship, the Labourcraft 2005, can demonstrate whether the UK market for this brand of boat has survived recent buyer nervousness.

The future success of the Labourcraft 2005 relies upon BBMI’s past reputation for manufacturing dependable and efficient boats in a marketplace that offered little serious competition. This is coupled with the vital powerboat constituent; image. Most striking is the vessel’s bold profile and sense of proportion; a visual appeal that is rarely tarnished thanks to a Teflon-coated hull to which nothing can stick, however toxic, unsightly or unpleasant.

On a purely practical level, the yacht has some novel innovations including twin helmstations located port and starboard atop the lofty flying bridge enabling two people to drive the boat at the same time. BBMI incorporate many American components in their yachts and the power of the Labourcraft 2005 is formidable with propulsion from twin 900hp Bushmaster drive units providing fluctuating top speeds and - with exhaust outlets above the waterline - deafening noise levels.

Indeed, this preference for US technology, design and production practices led BBMI to relocate a large part of its manufacturing base and workforce in the Middle East without consulting any of the company’s 56 million shareholders; a move that has severely shaken consumer trust.

Power, however, is redundant without impressive handling capabilities and the yacht boasts a deep V hull with chine flats and spray rails to minimise roll and accentuate grip in adverse and hostile weather conditions. Disappointingly, though, the company’s motto - 'Forwards not backwards' - suggests limited control sensitivity and, with an absence of bow or stern thrusters, the Labourcraft 2005 lacks manoeuvrability rendering it incapable of going astern; a feature that will alienate any cautious, circumspect potential buyers.

The yacht is faultless in terms of communication capabilities; the superstructure and radar arch bristle with advanced satellite equipment and antennas. For many past and potential customers, communications is the chief selling point of BBMI’s craft and these vital systems are run by a highly effective Campbell generator, the Spin-King Powermax.

No luxury motor cruiser is complete without a stern garage and behind the yacht’s transom door - between the bathing platform and the telescopic passarelle - is the yacht’s voluminous toy cupboard. BBMI’s new model will retain a 3 metre sailing dinghy, the Cherie 9.8, as standard; a functional and practical sailboat, but not a tender one would want to be spotted cruising around in. The Labourcraft 2005 also offers a powerful, Mandy 450 cc personal watercraft in its inventory. The Mandy has already been withdrawn twice when it was found to possess profound design faults and displayed dangerous and potentially damaging performance flaws. Recently it has come perilously close to being axed for a third time when it was found inappropriately in the inventory of an American competitor.

Absent from this year’s model is the Blunkett Deep Sea Diving Bell, withdrawn after the device was proven to be vulnerable to attacks from sharks and drew the attention of winged harpies.

The company most likely to unsettle BBMI’s status as the current market leader is the Brittannia,Conservative and Jingo Imperial Steamship Company(BCJISC). Since the company’s success in building warships has waned (the devastating Class 1 frigate, the Thatch Enforcer, dominated the seas between 1979-90), BCJISC have launched several new models, all of them short-lived and lacking the steel plate of their 1980s predecessor. They have since begun manufacturing luxury sailing yachts and will launch their latest model on 5 May; the elegant Bluewater Promise.

Much is expected of this yacht and - on first appearances - this refined inshore/offshore classic does not disappoint. The broad beam-to-length ratio ensures that the Bluewater Promise will be a stable platform for extended voyages and the yacht’s design team wish to assure potential customers that intense care has been taken with LCG (Longitudinal Centre of Gravity) calculations. This said, it has been noted that the yacht lacks much in the way of new features and when at anchor displays an alarming list to starboard suggesting extra weight has been placed in this side of the hull. Powered through the water by a single, mighty mainsail from the Howard and Bogeyman loft in Transylvania, the resultant loads on the mast and rigging are immense, but the absence of any headsails promise not to tax her faithful crew.

Available in any colour (as long as it’s blue), the yacht is uncompromisingly traditional below decks; the saloon is rich in teak splined with maple while an overall atmosphere of established luxury evoking echoes of values from a past era ooze from the deep, elephant hide furniture. This genteel veneer, however, vanishes on contact with the vessel’s more modern elements; features that owe much to BCJISC’s previous experience as a world leader in the manufacture of pocket battleships. Security systems on board the Bluewater Promise are highly advanced and include sensitive alarms to indicate unwanted stowaways (installed as standard) with an efficient method to eject any unwanted guests who have outstayed their host’s hospitality.

On a more wholesome level, the yacht’s designers have promised on board medical facilities of unprecedented splendour with high levels of cleanliness and efficiency. BCJISC are quick to point out that their main competitor, BBMI, has an appalling record in this field, claiming that anyone falling ill on a Labourcraft is likely to contract a number of highly exotic diseases during any visit to the boat’s medical centre.

The final launch on 5 May comes from Liberal Democraft, builders of fine canal boats for many years. When not being distracted by their new dinghy model, cruising the inland waterways of Britain is a speciality for this company where length must always be in proportion to beam. Their latest, innovative model may have appeal for those yachtsmen who have grown weary of the unreliable Labourcraft after sales service.

The Liberal Democraft has no GPS, radar or direction finding equipment and a rudder is optional. While ideally suited to calm waters, this vessel is powered by a robust, Scottish, Kennedy Steam Engine (both thirsty and prone to producing large amounts of hot air) that is probably incapable of maintaining any form of navigation in the turbulent seas that may suit the Labourcraft or the Bluewater Promise. Although the Democraft has long been marketed as 'The Thinking Person’s Boat,' many anxious consumers feel that the lack of on board safety features could result in catastrophe should the boat encounter confused or complicated conditions.

Obviously, this is a superficial review of three complex craft, but it may serve as a timely guide through the murky waters of purchasing a new British superyacht. Whatever sales figures are released on 6 May, it is unlikely that the launch of these British yachts will generate the same global interest as the recent launch of Italy’s newest, luxury retro-cruise liner, the German-built Benedict 16.