LG Flatron crew launch new venture

Anne Weir reveals the radical new sailing venture

In a break with BT Global Challenge ethos, the crew of LG Flatron have taken a radically different approach to the closing stages of the round the world yacht race and cashed in most of their accumulated points score to launch a new sailing venture: New World - Old World Tours Uninc.
Reversing centuries old sailing practice they plan to finish where most ocean ventures begin - leaving scores of close relatives and friends stranded on the harbour side of the final destination ports. (If the disappointed fans have any sense they’ll head for the best hostelry in town and stay there).

The concept behind this sailing extravaganza was almost certainly hatched somewhere close to the equator when crew members were let loose on a contraband bottle of gin. Looking into their paper cups as the sun went down they realised this was their last chance to see a bit of the world.

Before they knew it, they had been transported (no pun intended) to the west coast of Africa and were making close calls on Guinea Bissau and the Gambia, and taking a day tour of the Dakar isthmus. Intoxicated by the sight of land they dodged the sand banks as they fought their way up the coast past Mauritania to Morocco.

Realising their rations might not last if they extended their tour into the Mediterranean, LG Flatron reckoned they could nevertheless squeeze in a few mid Atlantic islands before resuming their continental hop to Europe. Billed as the highlight of the tour this detour took them close to disaster. As they meandered around islands with names they’d never heard of before, they clearly lost their sense of direction and started heading south.

A sharp-eyed crew member, who had an appointment with a lady in a church before the end of the year - drew his watch leader’s attention to this oversight and the boat headed off again for yet another archipelago with yet another big volcano cutting off the wind. Skirting round Madeira (most of the crew realised they’d actually been there before) further perils awaited them - for a start they’d nearly got themselves back the race - not part of the game plan.

No worries. This crew were hell bent on seeing a bit of the old world before they got home and within days they were ready to moor up at Porto on the Portuguese coast - and enjoy a glass or two of the local brew. Alas, the skipper pointed out again that if they didn’t get a move on they’d be reduced to living on 'Go' bars and couscous for the rest of the trip.

After a few minor repairs (fixing the main sail track back to the mast) they pulled the big sail up again and set off in a zigzag course towards Cap Finisterre (they knew they were close to home then as they’d heard of this place on BBC Radio 4 shipping forecasts in the Solent last year).

The last hurdle lay ahead - crossing the Bay of Biscay to La Rochelle in France where riots were breaking out amongst the well-oiled supporters on the quayside. Headwinds for the last 300 miles forced them to hug the Spanish coast so allowing more touristic detours to sites of other historical defeats such as La Coruna.

Commenting on the tour just days away from arrival in France and only ten days later than planned, crew volunteer Anne Weir said - its like a zoo out there - all those dolphin and jelly fish, tuna and whales - I really could have stayed at sea for another month.

The rest of the crew have recommended Anne makes a slow return to real life when she finally gets back to the UK on 30 June (LTA).